Relationships. What can one say about relationships? They are confusing, frustrating, messy, inconvenient, bring out the worst in people, and sometimes, just sometimes worth it. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a hater of love (or what we mistake for love), but over the years I have accumulated chronicles of the what not’s, and the never go there’s in this treacherous world of dating.
The most infamous of dating urban legends is the “Fairytale a la Broad” also known as long distance dating. We all have that girlfriend, the one who comes home after meeting someone by accident, and all of a sudden she is seeing stars. After what feels like an eternity of explaining exactly how they met, she mentions that he is from Alabama and leaves in two days, but ends with the good news, which is that he promises to call her when he returns home. As a woman I feel it is my obligation to my fellow sex to say with confidence that this is never going to work. Let’s get real. You met him at a bar, most likely after throwing back a few drinks, you had great conversation, a couple laughs, and best of all “sparks,” which all too often is really indigestion, but tomato/tomato, or however that saying goes. You have one MIRACULOUS weekend, and before you know it he’s on a plane back home. Weeks go by with text messages, and the occasional phone call, and bam! The next moment your friend is talking about how she needs a change of scenery and is considering finding a job in Alabama after she graduates in May.
Now ladies, and gentlemen if this fits your scenario, let’s be honest. There are no jobs is Alabama. And the most disturbing of all is that you think you’ve found the “one” just because every Friday night he drunk texts you the oh so romantic line of “Goodnight Beautiful.” Let’s raise the bar a little bit, shall we? Quickly I will sum up the outcome of this one-sided relationship. He stops calling, and she vents about this to her uninterested friends for weeks on end. He goes out with the guys, no qualms about it. She goes out but checks her phone every 23 seconds to see if he has called. Long story short, it doesn’t work. If you’re lucky you might have a couple cousins marrying each other in a town near his own, and possibly you’ll have another romantic tryst, but the calls stop, so do the cheesy texts, and seven and a half months later she’s finally over it. All because of thirty hours or so with a man who she barely knows.
Whatever happened to having a great night with great company and enjoying it for that, with no strings attached? Well, I blame society for brainwashing us with all those romantic Disney movies, all those damn damsels in distress who get carried away by a prince on some snazzy horse, a modern day prince who just so happened to be the heir to the Super 8 motel chain. Well I say enough! It’s time we start approaching life with a little more reason, and a little less fairytale. That’s that, and I’m sticking to it.
Love Always….or at least until next week,
Miss M (aka Trudy Weigel)
Copyright: Reno Gazette in cooperation with the Reno Police Department
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